What would it be like if you no longer have to worry about your weight?
You could eat whatever you want, whenever you want, and be healthy.
How freeing would that be for you?
This is exactly what my guest today, Beth Smeeton, Intuitive Eating Coach helps you with.
We talk about the similarities between the disordered behaviours so many women have with food and money that’s defined by deprivation, shame, guilt and control.
Plus Beth shares practical advice and tips to anyone who wants to try Intuitive Eating, or help someone they love get a healthier relationship with food.
Key Takeaways from this episode:
Listen to the episode to hear more about Beth’s journey.
Hi and welcome to The Financially Free Woman Podcast! I’m Sharon and I’m the creator of this non-financial, financial podcast about money and how money affects the work you do, the relationships you have and your ideas about freedom. This podcast is all about discovering who you really are and what you’re meant to be doing with your talents. This, to me, is your path to financial freedom - where you get to spend time doing what you love, get paid for it, and make a difference in the world. In this podcast, I also interview women who are doing exactly that - making a living with their passions, because you CAN have passion and profit. I do this in the hope that it inspires you to take the steps to turn your passions into profit. Thank you for joining me on this exciting journey. Let’s get started!
Hi everyone. And welcome to another episode of the financially free woman podcast. Today's guest is Beth Smeeton and I am so excited to have this conversation with Beth because Beth is an intuitive eating life coach. And if you're wondering what that is, that's going to be exactly what we're getting into in today's interview. And Beth helps you heal your relationship with food and body so that you can feel like the truest version of yourself as your coach. Beth takes you through her signature three step process so that you can feel in control around food and enjoy your life. That teaches you how to listen and trust your body wisdom. Plus coach you through any obstacles or challenges that come up for you week after week. So this sounds really intriguing, really interesting. And I know for you, women is probably going to be a topic of great interest. I know it certainly is for me, which is why I got Beth to come on. So without any further delay let's give from Beth and maybe Beth. Hi, welcome to the podcast,
Sharon, thank you so much for having me.
I'm so, so excited to have this conversation with you. Not just, I mean, as it relates to money, which I think there's a lot of commonalities, but just personally as a woman and also having a teenage daughter who is definitely having some body image issues at the moment. So I'm really excited to hear what you, the tips and advice you've got. But for those of us, with those of my listeners who may not be so familiar with the work that you do, what exactly is intuitive eating and how you got to do what you do now, would you like to give an introduction about yourself and your journey and how it's brought you to where you are today and what you do?
So it's started way back when I was 16. So I actually struggled with disordered eating myself and I started dieting at the age of 16, and I was always trying to fit into a certain size. It was always trying to lose weight, wait. And at the time, it's interesting if I think that I even think that I had a disordered relationship with food or an unhealthy relationship with food or my body. And I think it's because it's so normal to trying loss weight or try and track your food or check calories and all of that, that, so I didn't necessarily know that I had these issues and I didn't necessarily understand that I was trying to make my body a certain size that it just wasn't meant to be. And it was after years of living that way. And I even, when I was around 30, I had thought I had found the answer.
I don't know if you're familiar with tracking macros or what that is. So that's what I had found. And I thought that was like the answer to everything I was working out. And I thought I had healed my relationship with food with that. However, I quickly realized, and I say quickly, but it was actually after four years, I realized that it was still very disordered. I was coaching at the time I was helping women with tracking their macros. And what helped me kind of a light bulb in my head understand was a friend from college, ended up reaching out to me and she wanted help. And I had this just nudge this feeling inside of me that, okay, something's wrong. If I feel like I ended up giving her other resources as like, I couldn't, I felt like I couldn't help her. And I felt like if I started to help her, that I would be passing down these disordered behaviors, because even though I was helping women, there was something inside of me that was like this isn't right.
And it, what that looked like for me was I was weighing myself every day. I was weighing all of my food and tracking it in an app and using that app to let me know whether I was allowed to eat or not essentially. And I was also binge eating. I was eating an excessive amount because I was restricting so much and I didn't have the vocabulary at the time. I didn't understand. I thought I just had a self control issue. I thought I had willpower problems and it wasn't until, you know, like I said, that friend reached out to me and I was like, okay, I need to actually get help. I need to figure out what to do. And I ended up pursuing a master's certification in life coaching. And what that helped me identify was that I was putting all of my self-worth in the size of my body. And I was just needed to release that fear of the sphere of like living in my natural size and allowing food to just be fun again and enjoy food again and not to look at it as numbers and just overall feel free around food. And so once I was able to do that, that is what has brought me to now help women do the same. And it's, it's amazing. So it's been a lifetime in the making, so yeah, that's how I got to what I'm doing now.
Wow, amazing. I'm so curious to go back to the beginning though, because I'm looking at you now, and of course you guys are listening to it on a podcast and you can't see, and it's not like, as if bare-faced, I mean, if I just looked at you, you wouldn't strike me as someone who actually has any weight issue at all. Right. So I'm just curious to know, was it because when it all started, how did it start? I know for myself, I was a very overweight child and, you know, people would call me, my own brother obviously would call me names like fat so and like, and comments like then set me off on my own kind of disordered behavior when it came to food. What was it for you that kind of started you thinking that you need it to, you have to fit into that bodies that size?
Yeah, so I, at 16, I think at that time, for me, it was a lot of boys. Like I wanted to like look a certain way for boys and in my own healing journey, what I actually figured out though is, so my mom is also small. She's, she's smaller than me. And so I really compared myself to her a lot. And that was pretty subconscious. It didn't feel like I was consciously doing that, but her, I have quotes like her large size was what my normal, what my natural set point weight was. So when I grew up hearing stories about her heaviest, I made that mean my body is wrong. My body is bad. I need to fit this certain mold because then I'm going to be loved and accepted. And again, my mom wasn't shaming me or whoever's ever saying any of these things to me directly, it was more about telling her story and her own experiences with her life in her body. And then as a child and a teen, I then internalized it and made it mean so much more about myself when it had nothing to do with me. And once I realized that at game over, everything changed and that I was able to release all of that fear.
So that when you finally release the fear and then this whole kind of journey to what you do now as an intuitive life coach, which I'll get you to explain in a moment has that kind of change like your body weight size or anything that is actually even out of the whole equation. That's the part I think kind of leads into the whole idea of intuitive eating as well.
Yeah. So idea with intuitive eating is that you don't lead with, you're not working to be a certain size. So for me, my personal journey was when I started intuitive eating and letting go of that tight control with food, I had to learn how to listen to my body and what hunger felt like, what fullness felt like, what foods I actually liked and not felt like didn't feel like I had to eat, um, because they were considered healthy. So as I was learning my body cues, I did go up and wait, but once I was able to be super into and, and understand my body again, it went back to my natural set point. So what's interesting is that I was killing myself to be a certain size. And then once I went through my own healing process, I am effortlessly at that same size. And it's like not a problem at all. And it's, it's just fascinating to think back of the experience.
Yeah. I mean, can you talk a little bit more about this set weight, I guess it's also around this acceptance of that natural set weight. We have so much issues with, I mean, I share a little bit about myself, so I obviously had weight issues when I was younger and I've tried, I don't know, back in the day. So I'm obviously older than you. So back then, there were all the things like counting calories, crave, fats, liquids, and all sorts of different diets, probably what would be like paleo and keto in those veins. And, you know, I try all of that. Then I was running excessively and that dropped the weight.
But the food intake, I was just at one point just having vegetables and fruits because I wanted, I didn't want to touch cops at all. And then I heard all these things about how, you know, once you start on cops, you're going to create it more. So don't even start. So I love that probation and the way it would go up and down, and then it wasn't until over time, I think I got older and I just got to a point, like I was just tired and I just said to hell with it, you know, whatever. I'm just going to eat healthy, eat whatever I want. And I found that when I reflect back now the way it would always seem to come back to that range, that ideal range. So can you explain a little bit more around that? And I think it's really more the acceptance of that. That is something that a lot of us kind of struggled.
Yes. Great question. So we all have a genetic set point weight range, and that range is between 10 and 20 pounds. And that's the weight that our body is meant to be. It's when we're not killing ourselves when we're not also when we're not ignoring our fullness cues. So when we're listening to our body, that's where we're naturally meant to be. And I think what gets us kind of messed up around that is the BMI scale where it's like telling us, okay, when we're a certain and we need to be in this range of weight. And that scale is completely inaccurate. It was made by like a mathematician. It wasn't even created by a doctor. So for me personally, I was using that scale and I was like, Oh, okay. I need to be this way because I'm short. I'm only five one. And when I look at my natural weight, it's on the higher range. So I was like, Oh my God, I need to fit this mold. So in order to just like, except that it's, once you are in tune with your body, you're feeding yourself like food that makes you feel good and that you love and enjoy. It's almost like the acceptance comes so much easier when you lose that struggle with food. That's what I have found in with me and my clients too.
Mm. And what about, let's say if the food that makes me feel good is kind of all sweets and cakes like desserts.
So that's such a common thing or common fear with intuitive eating to begin with, especially with intuitive eating. If there is a period where you, Oh, it's so all foods fit your, this part of intuitive eating is giving yourself permission to eat everything without any limitation. So if you have been dieting for a long time, you may be drawn to like cookies and cake and you think, Oh, I'm just addicted to sugar, but all that's happening really is you're kind of getting out of your system. What was once restricted. But once that's out of your system, it becomes normalized and it's no big deal. You realize, Oh, I can have cookies and cake for breakfast if I want, or any time. And they lose their own word, the food just like comes off the pedestal, your body craves, like nourishing food. So not just cookies and cake. It also wants vegetables and fruit and we, our bodies want to thrive. So that does come naturally over time. We don't need to force it.
Because I've seen how people, uh, you know, and I don't know, like sometimes I'll see, I have relations, like family relations, right. Who are really big. And they eat all the time and they eat like for us in Asia, we eat a lot of rice. Right. So eat a lot of rice and they okay. At least outwardly it doesn't seem like they really care about their weight. They just eat whenever they want to eat. And then there'll be eating every half an hour. I played a ride and they will be that size. And I don't know. I mean, what's going on there? You think?
Okay. Great question. So this is part of what I think even sets me apart from other intuitive meeting coaches. And the third step of my program is identifying these triggers. So really identifying what's causing you to eat when you're not hungry, or what's causing you to ignore your fullness cues. That's a big one. So whether it's like stress, eating, emotional eating, or just binge eating from restriction where you feel like you just need to get this food in now and it's going to be restricted later. So we identify what's happening. What are the thoughts that they're thinking, what are the feelings that you're either numbing or covering up waiting with food? Because usually when we have an unhealthy relationship with food, that's the first thing that we turn to in order to see with ourselves or comfort ourselves.
That's actually a really great segue to maybe tell us a little bit more about what you do as an intuitive coach, because you talked about how that's the third step. And I know you have this three-step process, which you'll be able to give us kind of like a broad overview of what those three steps are.
Yeah. The first step is making peace with food and your body. So really looking at food as neutral, getting rid of the good or bad, healthy, unhealthy, just food is neutral. Same with your body. So changing how you think and feel about food in your body. And the second step is to, I teach you how to eat intuitively. So there are tools and exercises that I give my clients to help them learn how to be in tune and listen to their body, which is hunger cues, fullness cues, satisfaction cues. And then the third step is what I just described as far as identifying and solving for your triggers. So if you do feel like you are unable to honor your body, we uncover what's going on there so that we can solve for that without using food rules or calories or anything like that. So we can solve the root cause.
Hmm. Okay. Okay. So you, you know, you talked about how, since 16, you had this kind of relationship with food and it's kind of been a journey to what you're doing now. And have you always been doing this sort of like coaching? I just want to know, like find out a little bit more about, did you ever, because part of the podcast that I talk about is about women who have kind of over time through trial and error found something that they really love doing and they really enjoy doing. And you've talked a little bit about that journey and I just wanted to find out if what you're doing something different before and to what you're doing now.
I was doing something completely different. I went to college and my degree is in industrial design. So I'm a designer by trade.
Wow. That is different.
Yeah. I was a creative director for retail design company and I, well, I loved it so much. And I ended up getting laid off from that company due to budget cuts because we were, I was leading new store design so they can no longer open new stores. And it was actually something I knew was coming. So I was not mad about it. And during, you know, not as severance package. And during that time, I ended up getting certified as a health coach. I thought that that would be something fun for me. It wasn't like, Oh, this is what I'm going to do. Now. It was more like, Oh, this seems like a good idea. This seems like something fun. And as I was, like I said, with the macro coaching and coaching, I realized, okay, this is super fun, but I didn't fall in love with it as much until I was went through my own journey and with intuitive eating and do what I do now, now it is like, no turning back. It's something that I love so much. I love all my clients and meeting everyone and talking to them and helping them through this. It just lights me up.
What's the thing that you love about it, what you're doing now.
I think the, like, yes, the process of helping women through this, but the end of having them feel so completely framed and reflecting on where they were when we started versus where we are at the end is just like, it's the best.
Yeah. When you, when you see the transformation I suppose in them. Yeah. Yeah. And how was that light in terms of, I mean, I really don't know because this is a financial free woman podcast. How did you make that work financially? I mean, from a job that gives you a regular pay and income to kind of something that sometimes it can be up and down.
Yeah. I mean, I still had a job, so I still had a nine to five while I built my coaching practice and that worked for me and yeah. So I didn't just, I personally my journey wasn't okay. I'm going to go all in on coaching. I felt like I still wanted to have that nine to five while I built my businesses as well.
How did you make that trip? Because now you do this full time for you.
I do full time. I still have a nine to five though.
Oh, wow. Tell me how it was so intriguing. Cause I'm kind of doing that myself. I have my full-time job and I have this full-time podcast and business, like you say, so how are you making it work? I'd be so curious to exchange notes.
I, I feel like I've hit the jackpot with my nine to five. I love my boss and it's a company of there's seven of us and we're like a little family. And so since COVID hit, we no longer have an office. So we all work from home and I work nine to five and then I coach at night and it works because I don't feel so my nine to five isn't stressful. So I have to have the energy for coaching at night.
That's such a, that's such a cool combination, I think. And yeah. So for anyone who's listening, it's never going to have to be an either or it can actually be an end right. This end. Is that yeah. So, so cool to hear that. Okay. I want to go back into the intuitive course, a little bit of a detour. That was just about your, your journey, but just the go back into the intuitive coaching thing. What, what is kind of like the biggest struggle with your clients? Like the biggest thing that they find hardest to get over and move forward in this transformation?
I think body image is the hardest. I think with food, my clients are so ready to let go of the good and bad and they're ready to feel like, Oh, this I can eat whatever I want and feel free around that. It's the body image piece that takes longer. And I think that's normal for years of telling ourselves one thing about our body and then rewiring and reprogramming a new way of believing. It just takes a little bit longer, but once they do, it's like, Oh, why didn't I do this sooner?
Yeah. Yeah. What advice would you have for someone who is really in kind of struggling with that body image issue, what would be kind of the first steps that they can take if they don't even know? I think sometimes they meet, well, number one, they may not even be aware that that's kind of, what's the driving force behind the diets and all of that. It could just be, Oh, you know, I really want to look like that, but they don't have that conscious connection that, you know, what, you know, what, why, why do you want, when you have to look like that? And the whole body initially could be just they're unconscious, but even if they are conscious of coming to consciousness about it, but find it difficult, what's kind of like a simple first step that people could take to begin this kind of gradual change.
Yes. I think the best step to take is to start working on your belief that you're more than a body and the understanding that people are drawn to you and love you for, for you. What's inside. Like one of the first exercises I do with my clients is I ask first I ask what they love about themselves. And if that's too much of a challenge, because sometimes it is, I ask them to think about someone that loves them and how they would describe them. So that kind of opens the door and unlocks and sees like, Oh yeah, this is what, this is who I really am so that they can start to focus on those things and understand, okay, I am more than a body and focus on the inside.
Yeah. Yeah. That's, that's a great way to start. So as a mom, cause you talked about it earlier about how you, I mean, not that our moms kind of say anything intentionally at all, now that you mentioned, I'm thinking also my mom would tell us stories about how, when she was younger, she would just have an Apple for lunch because she was always very conscious about eating healthy. And then she'd be like, Oh no, I've put on so much weight after eating all that I'm going to have to, and then I'll see her eat something really light, which kind of like is a natural way, I suppose, of adjusting it. But as a child, we just make the meaning, whatever it means for us at that time. Right. We didn't know any better. So I'm really interested to hear about this if you've worked with clients while also moms, cause obviously I'm a mum and I, when you talk about that, I'm just thinking back now about things and behaviors of mine that may have affected my daughter and you know, with kids, they're very direct. So she'll tell me, yeah, I remember the time when you used to tell him to stop eating so much rice, because I'm putting so much in like, no, I shouldn't eat so much and, and they'll be like, Oh, I did that. I don't even remember. So can you tell us a little bit more about as a mom? Like what we could do to help our especially daughters? I think maybe goals struggle with this a little bit more. I may be overgeneralizing here. I don't know. But what kind of suggestions or recommendations or advice would you have for moms and how, how are we dealing with food? Because that's picked up by all girls. Right.
I think focusing on the food part is like looking at us neutral to really be conscious about not calling something good or bad and labeling it as junk and just food is, has more nutrition or less nutrition. Like that's a kind of a neutral way to describe food when focusing, how, how the food makes you feel like, is it giving you energy? Is it making you tired? So just helping your child like get in-tune with her body and recognize and have the awareness around how food makes her body feel. And so she can have that connection there. And just to be conscious about any comments about yourself, about your own body size or your own weight, and just be sure to just be aware of that, to not say those things around her, just to have her not internalize them and make them use the thing about herself.
Yeah. Because I think sometimes with moms, we come from the perspective that we want them to eat good food that makes them grow, especially when they're young. Right. And then we get so hung up and then we'll see doctors and nutritionist. And of course it pulled up the BMI chart, right. That curve, like where are you on that curb with percentile? Are you on? And they're there. I mean, the child is there. Right. And so they're taking all of this in. And so as a mom, I mean, from my perspective, sometimes I just feel like my intention is to make sure that they're getting good nutrition. Like my son is the complete opposite. Like he's like the ultimate intuitive eater, I think because he'll have ice cream five days in a roll and then he'll just stop. He'd be like, no, no more ice cream. Right. Because you just get to a point where you can't have any more than you'll have like his fried chicken. And then sometimes you'd be like, I really don't like having anything. Can I just have just vegetables today? And so he's like the extreme, but sometimes when she's in that bingeing of ice cream, I'll be like, can you like go easy on the ice cream? Because it's been the fifth day you've been having this every day. And I don't really know what to do sometimes at that point as a mom, do I say, no, don't eat that. And I'm like, yeah, I know. Yes. And if he wants to skip a meal, sometimes I'll be like, are you sure you want to skip dinner? And you're going to be hungry at night later on. And so, I mean, I'm kind of like, as I'm hearing you say this, I kind of know in my mind, like I'm supposed to try not to associate kind of the negative meanings and keep it neutral when it comes to food. But how do I, you know, how does a mom, not just me, but how does how's his mom balance all that between wanting the childhood nutrition and eat healthy and then not kind of them making them form these sorts of unhealthy relationships with the food.
Yeah. I actually think you mentioned a lot of great ways just checking in with him and saying, are you sure you want that? Like, is that, how is that going to make you feel or are you sure you want to skip this meal? Like how aren't you going to be hungry? I think those are great check in questions that will help him. And anyone get curious about like, Oh, just to make it was a suit associations, have a habit with how you're feeling and not just like eating to eat or eating because it tastes good. And to really make that connection with food and the body.
Okay. Okay. So I'll just keep doing that. And it's easier now that the teenagers, I mean, it's a lot harder when they're very young and you can't really have that kind of conversations with them, but yeah. So, okay. I'm going to have to try that. But sometimes with the other one, it's more like she's doing like what you said, like measuring exactly how much water to take, measuring how much food. And it's kind of like, I'm only eating this, every single meal, like the menu is the same every single day on weekends, there's the weekend menu. But from Mondays to Fridays, that's the Monday to Friday menu. How does one get someone like that? Like her to start exploring beyond that without the fear that if I change anything and she weighs herself every day. And so without kind of like, how do we overcome that fear that if I change anything, then it's not going to work anymore.
Yeah. So I think with that, it always starts with letting go of trying to lose weight. And if she's not ready to do that, then okay. That's my choice everyone's choice. But I would encourage her to whatever her weekend menu looks like. And her weekday main menu looks like to start to incorporate some of the weekend food into the weekday and some of the weekday food into the weekend. So that all her days start to look similar in the sense, not in a sense of eating the same thing every day, but so it's not like, Oh, weekends are meant for cheese or to go crazy. It's just where it's, maybe if she's allowing cake on a Saturday, it's okay to eat cake on a Tuesday too, or during the week. It's not just meant for salads where she feels deprived Friday. So really to help diversify the menu.
So it's not so regimented, but like I said, I think it does start with the body image piece because like there's some fear around food right now with her. I've worked with clients that that way I was also in that way, myself, where it was like, I had to write a list of all my fear foods, what was, I really not allowing myself to eat? And I had to start to challenge myself one by one in a safe way. So it wasn't like I was opening the flood Gates to everything and everything, anything and everything. It was, Oh, okay. I am afraid of eating bread and how that's been affecting the body. I'm going to now challenge myself and eat this bread and prove to myself that I'm not going to blow up and it's all fine. And I actually enjoy it and it satisfies me. Slowly implementing foods and feeling, and to get that safety again around food.
Yeah. Great. I think that's going to be the first exercise I'm going to try and do, but you know, with teenagers, they, uh, she's kind of like tween right. 12 to 13, so she's just entering the teenage years. So it's, it's a little bit more challenging, but I think I'm just going to not push it and just take my time and try to encourage her and support her along the way. Yeah. So, uh, thanks for those tips. I mean, it's like, I feel like I'm having a personal coaching session right now. Thank you. And um, I mean, I know that these questions are going to be common to a lot of women, so thank you for sharing that I wanted to ask you also a little bit about, you know, with this journey that you've taken kind of number of years to get to, when you look back now, what would you say would be some things that you may have done differently or maybe some lessons that you've learned along the way that you feel is important to share with our listeners too?
Yeah, I think what is the most interesting is how I relate to my business is there's a lot of parallels with how I used to relate to food and my body and just, I personally had to be very cautious about not putting all my worth into my business and the success of my business and making it mean everything about me and to step back and be like, wait this business, I didn't start this business for me. I mean, yes, of course I love it. But I started this business to help women and to help women get through this struggle and to not be struggling for 20 years like I did, and to get through it and much quicker. So I think the biggest lesson has been to notice any time I'm feeling self-doubt or upset maybe about my business and notice that it's usually because I'm making it mean something about me when I turn that around and make it realize, wait, this business has everything to do with her. Then everything changes. And I'm able to like get out of my funk and market or write content or do whatever I need to do in my business. So I'd say that's the biggest lesson for me.
Yeah. So to actually be a bit more aware as well about that's happening. And I liked the language that you use. I mean, I mentioned this right before we actually, when we were connecting with each other about how you always make it about her, that specific person, how you can help that person. So I like that a lot. Is there anything that you want to make sure that we cover? I, I didn't talk about the TikTok thing. I don't know if you want to talk a little bit more about that because that kind of exploded, right. It just kind of went by, or do you want to talk a little bit more about that and how you made it fun with something that sometimes like this topic about our body image and weight can be so heavy? I mean, yeah, literally and figuratively what happened there? Just so people also know, and then they can go check out the link, which we'll put on the show notes as well.
Yeah. So I was noticing, like you said, there can be a lot of shame and judgment that comes with the behavior that I work with at the start. So I wanted to bring lightness to it. I remember feeling so much shame around this behavior, especially binge eating. And now I don't view that issue at all. To me, that behavior is really a cry for something that needs to be healed, something else is going on. So it's just a symptom like a headache or cough or something. Like, I, I really like to normalize that behavior and take the shame out of it. So TikTok, gives me because there's so much, it's like humor and dancing and just like, just so much lightness to that app. And I was like, you know what, I'm going to get on there. And I start dancing and I'm going to start doing crazy transitions and just like giving her quick wins and tips and just letting her know that she's not alone. And it blew up. It just exploded in like about a month. It got a lot of recognition. So that has been very fun.
Tell us what a lot means. Just so people get an idea of the magnitude of this thing when you first posted it up. And when did it was, and then to where you saw it suddenly where you started realizing, Oh my goodness, this is, Oh, you know, there's something happening here. Just so that we all have an idea of the scale of what you're talking about.
Yes. So I got on the app with zero followers and then within a month it went to 60,000 and I had 20 or 30 videos up. And my most successful viral video hit 1 million views, which was insane.
Yes. And within that time, right. Within a relatively short time.
Yeah. I, I was, I was amazed that that kind of visibility was even possible. So yeah, I think I w I went through a little bit of like, Oh my gosh, is this really happening? This is really fun.
Yeah. Because I, you know, that, that thing, you talked about the shame, and that's why I think I relate it so much with what I'm trying to do and how I'm trying to help, because I too also struggle kind of like with the shame around money for so long, so many other issues, I mean, a very complicated relationship I had with money and shame was a big thing. And kind of actually taking that first step. Does that talking about it was so, so difficult because it's, it's such a, you know, you feel like it's such a horrendous thing that no one has to know. What's actually really happening. You want to keep it secret. It's kind of like binge eating, right. Like, I remember I used to do this. I used to wait until there was no one home so that I would eat and then same thing with money.
And I've also found also like, this is whole deprivation, weird shameful thing around all of his like deprivation and then the shame. And then after that there's guilt. And then it's like in one big ball and a complicated feeling ball of feelings. Yeah. So I just want to encourage people that, to know, number one, like you said, actually are not alone. And you can see here, like with Beth and me talking Beth with about food and money, we all have some story that's happening behind the scenes, no matter what the external looks like. So externally, I was definitely keeping up appearances, but behind the scenes, it was quite different. And the first time you talk about it, it's always the hardest, but that's kind of the most powerful way I think, to start healing that relationship. And then as you talk more and more about it, you realize that, Hey, you know, I'm not the only one.
And I think, like we said, I think that TikTok, whole thing that happened it's because you were putting something out there that people were afraid to actually talk about. Right. And people could relate to it and resonate with it. And that's why you saw the response that you did. So that in itself is kind of like evidence and prove to everyone who's thinking that you're all just alone or you don't understand. My situation is so different. And I have all these other things. I mean, no matter how hard the situation is now, and I know some people are going through really difficult situations, just know that sometimes even just finding someone who you trust to actually just begin to talk about, or maybe just journal about it or just somehow to, and that's how I started. I started blogging about it first because I thought, no, one's going to read this.
Right. And then I took a little, uh, bravest step. I'm going to do podcast and talk about it. Oh no, one's going to download anything. And then I'm getting the weekly updates of, Oh, people actually listening to the podcast. I'm actually getting downloads. Okay. But then over time as you talk about it more, it just gets easier. And like you said, I like that word. You use normalizing it. Right.
It loses all its power when you start to talk about it. And what once felt so heavy, like a cup of coffee, this is part of, this is something I experienced and no big deal. And so it just feels so much later to share it and talk about it. And yeah help women know that it's okay. And even the statistic with binge eating is something like in the US at least something in 80% or so of women struggle with binge eating. And it's so fascinating because it isn't talked about and it's yeah. All we hear about our diets and how to lose weight. And it's like, can we actually solve what's really going on here? And which is why I love intuitive eating, because it just brings you back and connects you back to your body.
Yeah. And I saw that other statistic on your website about the percentage of diets failing. Oh yeah. 95% fail.
That is, you know, isn't that weird that the statistics are telling us already that this is whatever you're trying to do now. It's not going to work well to maybe 5%, but I, I really don't know, but it's not working, but somehow we just still keep doing that kind of in the hope that maybe I'll be the 5%. Whereas, you know, I think there's with intuitive eating and just the acceptance about our kind of set body weight that you talked about. I think that's, you'll be probably will actually end up losing weight over time. I mean, do you ever find that happening?
Yes. If, if women are above their set point, yes, they will lose weight. So there's three outcomes. Either you lose weight, maintain weight, or you gain weight. And it just all depends on where your body is at the start of the whole process.
And that's totally fine. All three outcomes where you're, where you're meant to be. Right. So cool. I always ask my guests final question, but maybe before that, I just want to make sure that you've got or whatever you want it to cover. Is there anything that we missed out today that you think you it's important for people to know?
I think we covered it. Yeah.
Cool. So then my final question, which I ask everyone is what's your definition of financial freedom? What does that mean to you?
I think that creating an income from doing what you love is financial freedom. So I like very pure and simple.
I like that. Just focus and just do what makes you feel good, whether it's food or whether it's the work that you do. And it's so, I'm so happy to hear that you're actually able to find your own way, like create what works for you, which is ultimately what it is, baby. And if it's intuitive eating or having a nine to five and having the live coaching, whatever, just doing what feels right for you and being in touch with how you are feeling about it, I guess. So cool. Really enjoyed this conversation so much. What's the best place for people to kind of connect with you and find out more about what you do Beth?
They can find me on my website at bethsmeetoncoaching.com or find me on Instagram or Tik TOK, which is as Beth Smeeton well. So cool.
Yeah. I'll put the links on the show notes as well. Thank you so much, Beth, for your time and your generosity as well in sharing all of your kind of wisdom and experience and your expert advice. Well, thank you so much for that. Appreciate it.
Thank you for having insurance so much fun.
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The Financially Free Woman Podcast Host
The Financially Free Woman Podcast was launched in November 2020 during the COVID-19 pandemic to share the stories of everyday people making a living doing what they love. While training her students in leadership and mental resilience, Sharon noticed the rising level of financial stress and anxiety experienced by many of her students. It dawn on Sharon that this was an opportunity for her to share how she overcame her own financial anxieties triggered by her personal experience with a 6-figure business debt and being let go from her job as the family's primary breadwinner. She began sharing everything she learned about mastering not just the practical side of money but also her mindset around money. Through this work, Sharon began meeting and building a community of women creating and living their dream lives. The Financially Free Woman Podcast is a collection of stories, practical tips and strategies to help you discover your passions, and use them to make a lucrative living. Imagine a life where you spend your time doing what you love and getting paid well for it! That's exactly what these women featured on the podcast are doing and they tell you how! Get inspired and start creating your own your dream life!